Related:

• I parked my hard disk - and got a ticket!
• I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed-reading accident.
  I hit a bookmark. -- Steven Wrigh...
• I just got out of the hospital after a speed reading accident. I hit a bookmark. -- S. Wrigh
• Marge: All right: it's time to vote for the grand prize.
  Jay: I vote for Barney Gumbel's sensitive yet unfortunately-titled film, "Pukahontas"....
• I was taking tickets at the movies when I got a phone call.
  This woman said, "How much is a ticket?" And I said, "Four dollars....
• I'm so nervous, yesterday I got a fingernail transplant!
• Marge: Homer, I'd like to talk to you. Homer: But then I won't be watching TV!
  -- "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie...
• I'm just catching up with yesterday - by TOMORROW - I should be ready for today.
• Just when I was getting used to yesterday along came today.