SOCIALISM:
You have two cows. Give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM:
You have two cows.
Give both to the government. The government gives you milk.
CAPITALISM:
You sell one cow and buy a bull.
FASCISM:
You have two cows. Give milk to the government.
The government sells it.
NAZISM:
The government shoots you and takes the cows.
NEW DEALISM:
The government shoots one cow,
milks the other, and pours the milk down the sink.
ANARCHISM:
Keep the cows. Steal another one. Shoot the government.
CONSERVATISM:
Freeze the milk. Embalm the cows.
