Related:

• Never ask your lover if he'd dive in front of an oncoming train for you.
  He doesn't know. Never ask your lover if she'd dive in front of an oncoming band of Hell's Angels for you....
• You know how it is when you go to be the subject of a psychology experiment, and nobody else shows up, and you think maybe that's part of the experiment?
  I'm like that all the time. -- Steven Wrigh...
• Sex is like snow... You never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it will last.
• All this big deal about white collar crime -- what's WRONG with white collar crime?
  Who enjoys his job today? You? Me? Anybody? The only satisfying part of any job is coffee break, lunch hour and quitting time....
• Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.
  -- Murphy's laws on sex...
• Joey: Hey, this isn't about juice anymore, alright man.
  Chandler: Alright, so what's it about? Joey: Eggs....
• Bart: Mr. Burns, I don't want to seem ungrateful, but I want to go home to my family.
  Burns: [sighs] I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this, but....
• How do you know she is a unicorn?" Molly demanded. "And why were you afraid to let her touch you?
  I saw you. You were afraid of her." "I doubt that I will feel like talking for very long," the cat replied without rancor....
• Anonymous Noncoward writes, "For my Economics 101 class, I have to pretend to be Bill Gates and write an editorial defending Microsoft against anti-trust charges, citing economic principles.
  To complete such an assignment violates every moral fiber of my body....