Related:

• My mother is from Iceland and my father is from Cuba. I guess that makes me an Ice Cube.
• My mother thanks you, my father thanks you...
• My mother was a test tube; my father was a knife. -- Friday
• My father was doing some strange chores for my mother.
  They won't tell me what kind. -- How did your mom and dad meet?? -- Jeremy, AGE 8...
• I had to go to analysis. They told me I had an unresolved Oedipus complex, which, according to them, meant I want to sleep with my mother.
  Which is preposterous. My father doesn't even want to sleep with my mother. -- Dennis Wolfberg...
• My mother loves ME! It's the computer she hates.
• That's okay, my mother didn't BEAR me either!
• My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.
  -- Peter De Vrie...
• My father invented the burglar alarm--which unfortunately was stolen from him. -- Victor Borge