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• Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. -- Garrison Keillo
• Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. -- Garrison Keillo
• Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. -- Garrison Keillo
• I once tried to spread a rumor that I had an offer of $
  15,000 to leave radio and fly out to the coast but when the story came back to me, it was $...
• I believe the word you're looking for is 'AAAUUGHHH'.
• Even now, I go to someone's house and think I am being a good guest if I am very quiet, don't ask for anything, and refuse anything that's offered.
  This behavior makes other people think of me as a nincompoop....
• You have taught me the fear of becoming lost, which has killed the pleasure of curiosity and discovery.
  In strange cities, I memorize streets and always know exactly where I am....
• if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world.
  -- Garrison Keillor, Lake Wobegon Day...
• There's no place like home when you're not feeling well. -- Garrison Keillor, "Lake Wobegon Day