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• So simple a child could do it... go find me a child!
• Custody trial A husband and wife were getting a divorce, and so they were told to take their child to the judge so he could decide who would get custody.
  After reaching the judges office the judge looked at the child and said, "I'm going to let your mother take care of you....
• Quotes From Groucho Marx: - Time flies like an arrow.
  Fruit flies like a banana. - Room service? Send up a larger room....
• Where is God? Two bothers, ages eight and ten, were always getting themselves into trouble for some reason or another.
  If something was missing, they were probably involved....
• One day, a young priest in St. John's, Newfoundland, finds himself in the situation of having to hear confessions.
  He has never done this before, and so he is given a list of what to give out as penance....
• Child: Aw Mom. Whenever we visit Uncle Al he always wants to go bowling.
  He never wants to go with me to the court and play a few sets....
• How To Know Whether or Not You Are Ready For Parenthood MESS TEST
  Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flower bed and rub on the walls....
• Nominations for PMS Poster Child are open.