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• On their wedding night the husband was so self-conscious about the smallness of his penis that before undressing, he snapped off the light.
  Once he was in bed, he unziped his pants and handed his member to his bride....
• When Jeff gets sick of something, he throws up his hands.
  Jeff's third favorite sandwich? Cold Cuts! Jeff's favorite store? Footlocker!...
• How do you know if a lawyer is cold? He has his hands in his own pockets.
• A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub.
  She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately....
• Q: Why does Helen Keller need two hands to masturbate?
  A: One to do the work and the other to moan with....
• deer hunting A man took his wife deer hunting for the first time.
  After he explained the basics to his wife, he told her the most important piece of informatio...
• Our old friend Ed (the Texas Aggie) and his life-long buddy, Earl, went huntin' one day.
  They was walkin' through the woods when Earl decided to relieve himself behind a bush....
• ALIEN ZOMBIE & THE CONGO LIZARDS You’re in luck. As my luck would have it, I made my bones in a musical family.
  Grandpop slapped ivories at the Congo, and Daddy-O moonlit his rocket ‘88 in the lizard lounges....
• IF 1. If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
  2. If a deaf person swears in sign language, does his mother wash his hands with soap?...