A: Hi I'm New In Town--could You Give Me Directions To Your Apartment?
Pickup Lines and Jessica Comebacks
A: Hi I'm new in town--could you give me directions to your apartment?
B: Well, walking straight through the exit is your first clue.
What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)... Chain Saw
( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can turn a chain saw off....
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....
A tribe of Native Americans generally referred to their woman by the animal hide with which they made their blanket.
Thus, one woman might be known as Squaw of Buffalo Hide, while another might be known as Squaw of Deer Hide....
An Australian woman's car was involved in a motor accident.
A policeman asked what gear she was in. "Can't you see for yourself?...
Answering machines. Nowadays almost everyone has one, complete with a snappymessage of their own device.
Wait for the beep and then read on. This is a short adaptation of Simon Butler-White's and Clive Archer's "could-be" phone messages released in Australian Cleo, August 1989....
lt;Phone Rings> Noisy pick-up of phone Uh...<wisperingly> Hello?
Hi, I 'm a burgular and I was just about to steal Troy's answering machine....
A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup.
As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red 'H' on her chest....
She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time?
He: Do you have the energy? What is your favorite position on extramarital sex?...
Let's say you were trapped inside this room. Inside this room were 2 doors, and 2 caged talking - tigers.
One of the doors was an exit into the paradise. The other was an exit into a bottomless pit- (In other words, if you opened this door, you'd fall until your insides get ripped apart by the G-forces- actually you'd still fall- Anyway....