Limericks - Dirty
- An architect fellow named Yoric
Could, when feeling euphoric,
Display for selection
Three kinds of erection --
Corinthian, ionic, and doric.
- There once was a lady from Exeter,
So pretty that men craned their necks at her.
One was even so brave
As to take out and wave
The distinguishing mark of his sex at her....
- There once was a hacker named Ken
Who inherited truckloads of Yen
So he built him some chicks
Of silicon chips
And hasn't been heard from since then.
- There was a young whore from kaloo
Who filled her vagina with glue.
She said with a grin,
"If they pay to get in,
They can pay to get out again too!...
- There was an old man of the port
Whose prick was remarkably short.
When he got into bed,
The old woman said,
"This isn't a prick; it's a wart!...
- There once was a freshman named Lin,
Whose tool was as thin as a pin,
A virgin named Joan
From a bible belt home,
Said "This won't be much of a sin.
- There once was a queen of Bulgaria
Whose bush had grown hairier and hairier,
Till a prince from Peru
Who came up for a screw
Had to hunt for her cunt with a terrier.
- There once was a plumber from Leigh,
Who was plumbing his maid by the sea,
Said she, "Please stop plumbing,
I think someone's coming!
Said he, "Yes I know love, it's me....
- While bathing a student named Hume
Read a novel called "Sex in the Gloom",
On arriving the dope,
Skidded once on some soap
And pole-vaulted right out of the room.
- There once was a lady named Flo
Whose lava had poured out too slow,
So they tried it all night,
Till they got it just right,
Well practice makes pregnant you know.
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