PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young
man. Midnight is past your curfew!"
MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money you father and I spent on braces,
Mona, that's the biggest smile you can give us?'"
HUMPTY DUMPTY'S MOTHER: "Humpty, If I've told you once, I've told you a
hundred times not to sit on the wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!"
COLUMBUS'S MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered Christopher, you
could have written!"
BABE RUTH'S MOTHER: "Babe, How many times have I told you--quit playing
baseball in the house! that's the third window you've broken this week!"
MICHAELANGELO'S MOTHER: " Mike, can't you paint on walls lie other children?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: "All right Napoleon. If you're not hiding your report
card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!"
ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can't you just
wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
BARNEY'S MOTHER: "I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but
you're starting to look a little purple!"
MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset the you lamb followed you to school, Mary, but
I would like to know how he got a better grade than you!"
BATMAN'S MOTHER: "It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the
insurance will be!"
GOLDILOCK'S MOTHER: "I've got a bill here for a busted chair from the bear
family. You know anything about this Goldie?"
LITTLE MISS MUFFET'S MOTHER: "Well, all I've got to say is if you don't get
of your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there'll be a lot more spiders
ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: "But, Albert, it's your senior picture. Can't you
do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something....?"
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money across
the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really
been for the past 3 days!"
SUPERMAN'S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we've
decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so
much time in all those phone booths!"
THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric
light bulb, dear. Now turn off that light and get to bed!"
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...