Signs Arnold Schwarzenegger is 50 Years Old
15> His Humvee's left turn signal is always on.
14> Vericose veins bulging out of his neck.
13> Black leather jacket & motorcycle boots replaced by taupe
windbreaker & white loafers
12> Can no longer throw Uncle Ted out of parties with one arm.
11> Maria falls asleep before he can get his broadsword ready, if
you know what I mean.
10> Filming constantly interrupted with, "I'll be... LINE, PLEASE!"
9> "Mr. Universe" competition declines his suggestion for a "Best
Gums Over 50" category.
8> Hemorrhoids now larger than biceps.
7> Concludes every failed bowel movement attempt by saying, "I'll
be back."
6> Ever-increasing body count in "Grumpy Old Men" sequels since he
joined the cast.
5> Has to stop and rest mid-last name when signing autographs.
4> Changed his name to "Arnie Schwartz" and moved to Miami to play
bridge every Tuesday and Friday afternoon.
3> Most explosions in latest flick are the result of his worsening
lactose intolerance.
2> Every plot: Get revenge upon neighborhood kids for walking on
his lawn.
and the Number 1 Sign Arnold Schwarzenegger is 50 Years Old...
1> Has begun tucking his pecs into the front of his pants.
This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
The Top Five List top5@walrus.com http://www.topfive.com
15> His Humvee's left turn signal is always on.
14> Vericose veins bulging out of his neck.
13> Black leather jacket & motorcycle boots replaced by taupe
windbreaker & white loafers
12> Can no longer throw Uncle Ted out of parties with one arm.
11> Maria falls asleep before he can get his broadsword ready, if
you know what I mean.
10> Filming constantly interrupted with, "I'll be... LINE, PLEASE!"
9> "Mr. Universe" competition declines his suggestion for a "Best
Gums Over 50" category.
8> Hemorrhoids now larger than biceps.
7> Concludes every failed bowel movement attempt by saying, "I'll
be back."
6> Ever-increasing body count in "Grumpy Old Men" sequels since he
joined the cast.
5> Has to stop and rest mid-last name when signing autographs.
4> Changed his name to "Arnie Schwartz" and moved to Miami to play
bridge every Tuesday and Friday afternoon.
3> Most explosions in latest flick are the result of his worsening
lactose intolerance.
2> Every plot: Get revenge upon neighborhood kids for walking on
his lawn.
and the Number 1 Sign Arnold Schwarzenegger is 50 Years Old...
1> Has begun tucking his pecs into the front of his pants.
This list copyright 1997 by Chris White and Ziff Davis, Inc.
The Top Five List top5@walrus.com http://www.topfive.com
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