There is a lot of talk about the United Nations creating a combined strike force with troops from several nations included in it.

Could it work? Let's take a look at one operation. A combined force beach landing on a tropical island. When the troops hit the beach...

• The Royal Marines go fishing.
• The US Marines wait for CNN to arrive.
The French don't care whose beach it is; it's French territory now, and say the English gave them no other choice.
• The Canadians watch the Americans very closely, then neglect to guard their landing strip.
• The Dutch have a beach party and smoke some dope saying the English don't understand them.
• The Italians go sunbathing.
• The Germans land and build a car factory.
• The West Indians go looking for the Dutch.
• The Austrians just watch the Russians and Germans.
• The Chinese win the natives hearts and minds then kill them.
• The SEALs arrive after dark and kill anyone who is not a SEAL.
• The Aussies and Kiwis land then start fighting each other over a sheep.
• The South Americans send a contingent of 2000 generals.
• The South Africans start shooting at anyone with a tan.
• The Saudi's start drilling for oil.
• The Russians open a chain of massage parlours.
• The Brit airborne troops get charged with murder even though they have not opened fire yet.
• The Spanish are late.
• The Portuguese are late but blame the Spaniards.
• Delta Force makes a movie about the landing.
• The Greeks and Turks turn up then send a bill to the Yanks and Brits.
• The British Army cannot come because all six of them have flu.
• The Japanese don't know who owns what ships and decide to sink them all.
• The Californian National Guard contingent won't land until someone opens a Starbucks.
• The New Yorkers paint their Amtrak's yellow and will take you ashore for 50 bucks.
• The Irish Army will be late because they say they are stll celebrating St. Patrick's Day.
• The Israeli's start building a kibbutz and shell the Palestinians as a precaution.
• The Scandinavians like it off shore and stay there killing whales for the Japanese.
• The Polish tunnel under the beach looking for coal.
• The Palestinians say it used to be theirs but the English gave it away.
• The Oklahomans have no damn idea what a beach is.
• The Scottish claim to have found the beach first but accuse the English of stealing it.
• The Texans look for anyone bad mouthing them.
• The Mexicans invade Arizona by mistake.
• The Welsh say it's King Arthur's last resting place but the English stole it.
• The Swiss apply for a bank charter.
• The Libyans blow up two UN planes.
• The UN will send an Ambassador if the member states pay their dues.
• The Kentuckians open a KFC.
• The Panamanians ask the U.S. what they should do.
• The Floridians demand a recount and free Prozac.
• The EU want to set up a commission of 50,000 administrators paid for by the English.
• The Swedes just want to screw.
• The Michigan contingent issue a safety recall and sue General Motors.
• The Mattel Corp. sends 10,000 GI Joe's and one Barbie.
• Some guy from Tennessee swears that Elvis and Jimmy Dean are just over the dunes.
• The Romanians and Albanians finally arrive and surrender.
• The Coloradans cut off the Kansan's water supply.
• H. M. The Queen will give anyone a Knighthood if they can grab her a few hundred acres or find a job for Charles.
• The New Hampshire contingent declares that everyone there is Sooooo Cruel and open a soup kitchen.
• The North Koreans have no idea what is going on but blame America anyway.
• Washington State National Guard builds a monument to Bill Gates.
• The Pakistanis build a Motel Six, a convenience store and gas station.
• Jimmy Carter arrives and declares peace.
• Geoge W. Bush doesn't know where the island is, so he orders the U.S. Air Force to bomb Hawaii.