Homer: Oh, who am I kidding? I _am_ slow.
Marge: Oh, Homey, if you feel so bad about yourself, there's always
things you can do to feel better.
Homer: Take another bath in malt liquor?
Marge: There's that...or you could take an adult education course.
Homer: Oh, and how is "education" supposed to make me feel smarter?
Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old
stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home wine-
making course and I forgot how to drive?
Marge: That's because you were drunk!
Homer: And how.
-- Something to be really proud of,
"Secrets of a Successful Marriage"