Hutz: Ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to prove to you not only that
Freddy Quimby is guilty, but that he is also innocent of _not_
being guilty. I refer you to my expert witness, Dr. Hibbert.
Hibbert: Well, only one in two million people has what we call the "evil
gene". [holds up a card showing DNA] Hitler had it, Walt
Disney had it, and Freddy Quimby has it. [chuckles]
Hutz: Thank you, Dr. Hibbert. I rest my case.
Judge: You rest your case?
Hutz: What? Oh no, I thought that was just a figure of speech. Case
closed. [sits down]
-- Proper legal terms, "The Boy Who Knew Too Much"
Freddy Quimby is guilty, but that he is also innocent of _not_
being guilty. I refer you to my expert witness, Dr. Hibbert.
Hibbert: Well, only one in two million people has what we call the "evil
gene". [holds up a card showing DNA] Hitler had it, Walt
Disney had it, and Freddy Quimby has it. [chuckles]
Hutz: Thank you, Dr. Hibbert. I rest my case.
Judge: You rest your case?
Hutz: What? Oh no, I thought that was just a figure of speech. Case
closed. [sits down]
-- Proper legal terms, "The Boy Who Knew Too Much"
Related:
- Jasper: Why bother voting? He's guilty.
Flanders: Well,
we might as well make it official. Homer: What does... - Lawyer: I intend to prove that Freddy Quimby is totally innocent!
First of all, his accuser is a very shady character... - Lawyer: Your Honor, even though I've proven my client's innocence,
I'd still like to call Freddy Quimby to the... - Marge: [reading the paper] Mmm. It says Freddy Quimby beat a waiter
half to death!
Those Quimby children are so wild and rich, I ... - Hutz: Good news, Bart: the Krusty O Cereal Corp. has settled your case
for $100,000,
less, of course, my legal fees. Bart: [suspicious]... - Hibbert: Congratulations, Mrs. Simpson: you're pregnant.
Marge: Mmm... Hibbert: Am I to take it that this is... - Bart: Lisa, I gotta tell somebody. I was at the Quimby compound
yesterday when that frog waiter got whacked.
I _know_ that Freddy Quimby is innocent. ... - Blonde: Freddy honey? I think something just dropped into the back
seat.
Freddy: I'm not paying you to talk. -- Bart escapes... - Hutz: Well, you good folks can rest easy now because you've come to
the very best in legal representation.
Skinner: Uh, excuse me, is there an Orange Julius stand...
From the same category:
- Ned: I just attacked all my friends and neighbors just for trying to
help me.
I'd like to commit myself. Nurse: Very well. Shall... - Marge: Here's your lemonade, and here's your beer. Ooh,
you're such a vigorous young go-getter. When's... - Patty: This is a Mexican delicacy called a `taco platter'.
Selma: Mmm, delicious. -- Narrating a slide show... - Bart: You gotta help me. These two guys work me night and day.
They don't feed me. They make me sleep on the floor... - That Simpson, he thinks he's the pope of chili town.
Wiggum, "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro...
