Burns: Heh Heh, Look, Smithers -- A Creature Of Pure Malevolence.

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Burns: Heh heh, look, Smithers -- a creature of pure malevolence. He's
the perfect one to suckle at my proverbial teat. [opens window]
You there, boy! What day is this?
Boy: [cockney accent] Today? Sir, why, it's Christmas Day!
Burns: I was talking to _him_. You! What day is this?
Bart: Huh?
Burns: I'll tell you what day this is: today is the day you become my
[Bart throws a rock which hits Smithers in the head]
Ooh, I like him a _lot_.
-- "Burns' Heir"