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• For a school with no Asian kids I think we put on a pretty darn good science fair.
  -- Principal Skinner, "Duffle...
• Clerk: A good rule of thumb is two years' salary, sir.
  Try this. Principal Skinner: I can't afford that, I'm an educator!...
• I will not bribe Principal Skinne
• Principal Skinner: I'm going to ask for your Aunt Patty's hand in marriage.
  Bart: It's your funeral, Seymour. -- "Principal Charming...
• I'm disrupting the learning process, and I love it!
  -- Skinner loves Bart's "Go-Go Ray", "Duffle...
• a scream is heard from the room above] Skinner: Bart Simpson!
  I know it's you! -- Principal Skinner fills in for Miss Hoover, "Lisa's Substitute...
• There's one born every minute. -- P. T. Barnum (1810-1891)
• There's a sucker born every minute. -- P T Barnum