Related:

• Oh Doctor, I was in a wonderful place filled with fire and brimstone and there were all guys in red pyjamas sticking pitchforks in my butt!
  -- Homer recovers from a heart attack, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• Whatever doesn't kill me can only make me stronger!
• Clerk: Now before we give you health insurance, I have to ask you a few questions.
  Homer: Questions! Questions! My whole scheme down the -- [realizes] I mean ask away....
• Bart: Any luck, Dad? Homer: No, but the rabbi gave me this.
  [spins a dreidel] Bart: What is that? Homer: Son, it's called a droodel....
• Homer: Now Marge, if the unthinkable should happen, you're going to be lonely.
  Marge: Oh Homer, I could never remarry. Homer: Darn right....
• with Rabbi Krustofsky] Homer: Now I know I haven't been the best Jew, but I have rented "Fiddler on the Roof" and I will watch it.
  Anyhoo, can I have $50,000? Krustofsky...
• Homer: I got a bad heart. Ned: Homer, if I could give you my heart, I would.
  Homer: Shut up, Flanders. -- The heart of Flanders? God forbid, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• Patty: Marge, this is Andre. Andre: [with attempted sexiness] Hello.
  Selma: I think you two would make a perfect couple....
• Homer: Look, I let you down, and I apologize. I know that doesn't make it right, but I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me Lisa
  [not convincingly] I forgive you. Homer: D'oh! You didn't mean that!...