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• Myers: Hey, Krusty, you look great. You get your teeth bleached?
  Krusty: Yeah, it's a new kind of polymer treatment....
• Hello, I'm Kent Brockman, and welcome to another edition of `Smartline'.
  Are cartoons too violent for children? Most people would say, "No, of course not, what kind of stupid question is that?...
• Far be it from me to gloat at another's downfall, but I have a feeling that no children are gonna be crying when _this_ puppy is put to sleep.
  [laughs] -- Kent Brockman's `My Two Cents', "The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show...
• Myers: I have figured out how to rejuvenate the show.
  It's so simple, you egghead writers would've never thought of it!...
• Marge: Homer, I'd like to talk to you. Homer: But then I won't be watching TV!
  -- "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie...
• Dear purveyors of senseless violence: I know this may sound silly at first, but I believe that the cartoons you show to our children are influencing their behavior in a negative way.
  Please try to tone down the psychotic violence in your otherwise fine programming....
• Is it a masterpiece or just some guy with his pants down?
  That's our topic tonight on Smartline......
• Meyers: I did a little research and I discovered a startling thing.
  .. There was violence in the past, long before cartoons were invented....
• Movies! What a rip-off! I don't have to stand here and take this.
  I... [zzzzzzz] -- Grampa Simpson, "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie...