Related:

• I just want to call attention to the fact that I'm not watching this fight as my form of nonviolent protest.
  -- Lisa refuses to watch stolen cable, "Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandme...
• Apu: Oh, hello, Mrs. Homer. I brought an assortment of jerkys.
  Homer: Oh, did you swipe those from work? Apu: Certainly not....
• Apu: What a donnybrook, eh, Mr. Burns? Burns: Oh, hogwash!
  Why, I once watched Gentleman Jim Corbett fight an Eskimo fellow bare-knuckled for a hundred and thirteen rounds!...
• Cop: Word on the street is that you have an illegal cable hookup.
  Homer: No! No, I... It wasn't me. It was my wife....
• Announcer: The challenger learned how to fight in the notorious province[?
  ] of Capital City, and honed his skills while serving time for aggravated assault and manslaughter in Springfield Prison....
• TV: You're watching `Top Hat Entertainment'. Adult programming all day, every day.
  (Except in Florida and Utah.) Coming up next, `Stardust Mammaries'....
• I hate to interrupt your judging me, but I wanted you to know that I've made a couple of really important decisions.
  Number 1: I'm cutting the cable as soon as the fight's over, and Number 2...
• Man, I wish I was an adult so I could break the rules.
  -- Bart is caught watching a cable porn channel, [Burger King alert!...
• Cable. It's more wonderful than I dared hope. -- Homer Simpson Homer vs.
  Lisa and the 8th Commandme...