Related:

• Lisa: And I'm studying for the math fair. If I win, I'll bring home a brand new protractor.
  Homer: Too bad we don't live on a farm....
• Mm. My best dress...
  -- Marge watches Homer mow the lawn in her Sunday dress, "Dead Putting Society...
• Marge: Homer, I couldn't help overhearing you warp Bart's mind.
  Homer: And? -- "Dead Putting Society...
• Homer: Remember what Vince Lombardi said: If you lose you're out of the family!
  Marge: Homer! [slap] Homer: Ow....
• Why do I get the feeling that someday I'll be describing this to a psychiatrist?
  -- Lisa watching Homer mow the lawn in Marge's dress, "Dead Putting Society...
• Play it where it lays, Homer. -- Bart after Homer botches a putt, "Dead Putting Society
• Bart: But Dad! I've never won anything in my life!
  Homer: Son, this is the only time I'm ever gonna say this....
• Homer: All right, knock it off! Ned: Knock what off, Simpson?
  Homer: You've been rubbing my nose in it since I got here!...
• Ned: Oh say, you look like you were having a little trouble there.
  Homer: That shot's impossible! Jack Nicholson himself couldn't make it!...