Burns: Tell me, Simpson. If an opportunity arose for taking a small
shortcut, you wouldn't be adverse to taking it, would you?
Homer: Uhh, not as such.
Burns: Neither would I. I've always felt that there's far too much
hysteria these days about so-called cheating.
Homer: Yes, a lot of -- hysteria. [worried look]
Burns: Mm-hmm. If you can take advantage of a situation in some way,
it's your duty as an American to do it. Why should the race
always be to the swift or the jumble to the quick-witted? Should
they be allowed to win merely because of the gifts God gave them?
Well, I say cheating is the gift man gives himself!
Homer: Mr. Burns, I insist that we cheat.
Burns: Excellent.
-- "Mountain of Madness"
shortcut, you wouldn't be adverse to taking it, would you?
Homer: Uhh, not as such.
Burns: Neither would I. I've always felt that there's far too much
hysteria these days about so-called cheating.
Homer: Yes, a lot of -- hysteria. [worried look]
Burns: Mm-hmm. If you can take advantage of a situation in some way,
it's your duty as an American to do it. Why should the race
always be to the swift or the jumble to the quick-witted? Should
they be allowed to win merely because of the gifts God gave them?
Well, I say cheating is the gift man gives himself!
Homer: Mr. Burns, I insist that we cheat.
Burns: Excellent.
-- "Mountain of Madness"
Related:
- Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish.
Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?... - Homer: Wow, you sure know how to cheat, Mr. Burns.
Bu
Yes, well, I'm older than you. Burns: You know, Simpson, you're not as objectionable as you seemed when we first met.... - Moe: D'oh, he's going to ruin everything! All right, that's it,
Home
either Burns goes, or Moe goes. Apu: Yes, I am afraid that I am going to have to make a similar threat with my name in place of Moe's name.... - Man: I'm sorry, Mr. Burns, but I must object. This Simpson is not
qualified!
[There are nods of agreement] Burns: I see.... - Burns: Smithers, I've been thinking. Is it wrong to cheat to win
a million-dollar bet?
Smithers: Yes, sir. Burns: Let me rephrase that.... - Homer: I think I won, Mr. Burns.
Burns: Yes. [hauntingly] You won, all right.
You won more than you bargained for. Homer: Woo-hoo! -- "Mountain of Madne... - Homer: [ahem] A lot of you would think I was crazy if I did this.
[burns a dollar bill] Burns: He's crazy! -- Homer gives a speech, "Simpson and Delilah... - Homer: You know, Mr. Burns, you're the richest guy I know.
Way richer than Lenny. Burns: Oh yes. But I'd trade it all for a little more.... - Burns: Now before we begin, let me make one thing clear for you.
I want your legal advice. I even pay for it. But to me you're all vipers!...
