Kent: This Just In: Krusty The Klown Staged A Press Conference Today To Defend Himself Against Charges That His Products Are Unsafe

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Kent: This just in: Krusty the Klown staged a press conference today
to defend himself against charges that his products are unsafe,
his theme park is a death trap, and that he's marketing videos
of Tanya Harding's wedding night.
Krusty: And I contend that those tourists were decapitated _before_ they
entered the KrustyLand House of Knives[tm]. Next question?
Woman: What about that little boy who got appendicitis from eating your
cereal?
[shot of Bart with Lionel Hutz]
Krusty: To prove that this metal O is harmless, I will personally eat
one. [takes a mouthful]
See? There's nothing -- [starts screaming and writhing] Oh,
boy! This thing is shredding my insides.
Mel: Er, Krusty, that wasn't the metal one, that was a regular Krusty
O.
Krusty: It's poison!
-- Not much of a vote of confidence,
"'Round Springfield"

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