DNA guy: Ooh, nice eyelash. Yours? Wiggum: No. We need to find out who it belonged to.

DNA guy: Ooh, nice eyelash. Yours?
Wiggum: No. We need to find out who it belonged to. We want a DNA
test.
DNA guy: Ooh, ooh, ee, ooh, ooh, that takes, uh, eight to ten weeks.
Wiggum: [sighs, hands him a carton of cigarettes]
DNA guy: Did I say weeks? 'Cause I meant seconds.
[runs over to another machine, grabs a card from it; puts it
in a computer]
Wiggum: What do you got, the whole town's DNA on file?
DNA guy: Y'uh huh. If you've ever handled a penny, the government's got
your DNA. Why do you think they keep 'em in circulation?
-- Little-known facts, "Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two"