Smithers: Mmm...this guilt is driving me _mad_! I've _got_ to tell
someone.
[walks into a church; goes to the confession booth]
Father, I'm not a Catholic, but...well, I _tried_ to march in
the St. Patrick's Day parade. But anyway, I've got a...rather
large sin to confess. [sniffles] I'm the one who...shot Mr.
Burns!
Wiggum: [pokes head out, cocks gun] That's all I needed to hear! Boy,
this thing works great.
-- The wonder of confession,
"Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two"
someone.
[walks into a church; goes to the confession booth]
Father, I'm not a Catholic, but...well, I _tried_ to march in
the St. Patrick's Day parade. But anyway, I've got a...rather
large sin to confess. [sniffles] I'm the one who...shot Mr.
Burns!
Wiggum: [pokes head out, cocks gun] That's all I needed to hear! Boy,
this thing works great.
-- The wonder of confession,
"Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two"
Related:
- Lisa: Stop! Don't shoot my Dad. He's innocent. He wouldn't hurt a
fly!
[they open the door] Burns: [being strangled and shaken]... - Doris: Eternal darkness. Well, that's just great.
Apu:
Listen, someone's got to get that Mr. Burns. Where... - Smithers: Oh...could I have shot Mr. Burns in a drunken rage?
No, no, not me. I know in my heart I --... - Wiggum: Wait a minute. If the second old geezer got shot,
how come nobody reported it? [at... - Lisa: Hey! Chief Wiggum, what are you doing? What's going on?
Wiggum: I'm sorry, kid, we got Simpson DNA on Burns'... - Burns: Imagine it, Smithers: electrical lights and heaters running
all day long!
Smithers: But Sir! Every plant and tree will die,... - Burns: [menacing] I want that oil well. I've got a monopoly to
maintain!
I own the electric company, and the water works --... - Selma: Mr. Burns has been shot.
Wiggum: Just a minute!
This isn't Mr. Burns at all! It's a mask! ... - Wiggum: OK, boys, we've got a clue: the bullet they took out of Burns.
Now, let's discuss the, um...[picks up Agatha Christie...
