Related:

• Football players are measured by the yard.
• Football players do it offensively/defensively.
• Quote #304 "Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.
  -- Merle Kessle...
• I like my men to be...well...hockey players!
• I like my women to be...well...hockey players!
• Football players have odd shaped balls.
• Act like you've been there before.
• We hold college football players to _higher_ standards than Clinton.
• They call it football, but the object of the game is to bash the other guy so hard that he's eventually carried off the field on a stretcher.
  I can't watch football anymore. My psychiatrist said it's better that way....