Related:

• Texas A&M football coach Jackie Sherrill went to the office of the Dean of Academics because he was concerned about his players' mental abilities.
  "My players are just too stupid for me to deal with them", he told the unbelieving dean....
• Ross: Anyway. That's when our Mom said we were not to play football ever again.
  Monica: Y'know what, I think we should play a game....
• Bart: So...you're one of those "Don't call me a chick" chicks, huh?
  Lisa: Ehh, sorry about my unenlightened brother....
• Pedro Guerrero was playing third base for the Los Angeles Dodgers in 1984 when he made the comment that earns him a place in my Hall of Fame.
  Second baseman Steve Sax was having trouble making his throws....
• Whenever I'm faced with a difficult situation, I like to ask myself what my idol, Edward R.
  Murrow, would think; and I think Ed would call this censorship....
• Troy: [voiceover] When Krusty the clown got canceled, he tried everything to stay on the air.
  Here's what you didn't see. Krusty: Watch my show, I will send you this book featuring me in a variety of sexually explicit positions....
• aga n. [WPI] A cuspy but bogus raving story about N random broken people.
  Here is a classic example of the saga form, as told by Guy L....
• Bill: Let me get this straight: you took all the money you made franchising your name and bet it against the Harlem Globetrotters?
  Krusty: Oh, I thought the Generals were due! [TV shows a Globetrotter spinning the ball as Generals watch] He's spinning the ball on his finger!...
• Football is a game of cliches, and I believe in every one of them. -- Vince Lombardi