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You may be redneck... if you have to mow your driveway.
You may be redneck... if you have to rake leaves in your kitchen.
You may be redneck... if you have velvet Elvis paintings...in plain view.
You may be redneck... if you have velvet paintings above your mantle.
You may be redneck... if you invite friends over to see your lava lamp.
You may be redneck... if you keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
You may be redneck... if you keep a pellet gun by the front door.
You may be redneck... if you keep catfish in your aquarium.
You may be redneck... if you know how many bales of hay fit in your car.
You may be redneck... if you know how to hotwire a tractor.
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