Related:

• Q: How many Microsoft Programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
  A: It cannot be done. You will need to upgrade your house....
• How many Unix system vendors -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None. All of the light bulbs you have are 'standard variants' and as such won't fit your particular implementation of the socket....
• How many women -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None, they all get electrocuted trying to excite the socket....
• How many MS tech supports -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  "The light bulb doesn't work? You must be using a non-standard socket....
• How many software vendors -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None: You have to do it yourself, pay them $99 for the privilege, and re-wire your sockets to suit the new bulb....
• How many Conservative economists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None. "There is no need to change the light bulb. All the conditions for illumination are in place....
• How many Unix hacks -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Let's see, can you use a shell script for that or does it need a C program?...
• How many Necrophiliacs -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Only one. Oh, excuse me, could you please test the socket with your finger while I go get a new bulb?...
• How many surgeons -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Three. They'd also like to remove the socket as you aren't using it now....