Related:

• Eleven reasons a cucumber is better than a man: (1) Cucumbers can stay up all night, and you won't have to sleep in the wet spot.
  (2) Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves....
• A cucumber won't ask, How was it? -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• It's easy to drop a cucumber. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• With a cucumber, you never have to say you're sorry. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• A cucumber will never leave you for another woman. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• No matter how old you are, you can always get a fresh cucumber.
  -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me...
• A cucumber doesn't have hands when it's desperate. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• You can eat a cucumber when YOU feel like it. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me