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• I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Still tired from the move.
  Day 2: Everyone talks to me like I'm an idiot....
• Maj. Burns: What kind of idiot do you think I am? Cpl.
  O'Reily: You'd know that better than me, sir. -- M*A*S*H, television program...
• True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen. (Maxim 76)
• Everybody knows that the dice are loaded. Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed.
  Everybody knows the war is over. Everybody knows the good guys lost....
• I do my best to be just who I am, but everybody wants me to be just like them.
• He always talks like that. Sometimes, I think he can't help it.
• She looks around and sees everybody else's dad with a good education, youthful looks, and a clean credit record, and thinks, "Why me?
  What did I do to deserve this fat old piece of......
• True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen.
  -- Francis, Duc de La Rochefoucauld (1613-1680) -- Maxim 76...
• I have a funny daddy Who goes in and out with me And everything that baby does Daddy's sure to see, And everything that baby says, My daddy's sure to tell.
  You _m_u_s_t have read my daddy's verse. I hope he fries in Hell. -- Ogden Nash...