Related:

• You know you're in trouble when... 1) You wake up face down on the pavement.
  2) Your wife wakes up feeling amorous and you have a headache....
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: you see a "60 Minutes" news team waiting in your office.
• You know it's going to be a bad day when you see a 60 Minutes news team waiting in your office.
  -- Anon....
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: your twin sister forgets your birthday.
• You know it's going to be a bad day when your twin brother forgot your birthday.
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: your horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you follow a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: your only son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind her own business.
• You know it's a bad day when your team gets whipped by The Whalers!
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: your alarm clock-radio wakes you with the words "One minute to impact.
  -- Ambidextrous Rex (Of course, you won't have to worry about getting up to go to work.)...