Related:

• I believe in reincarnation. I've had other lives. I know.
  I have clues. First of all, I'm exhausted. -- Carol Siskind...
• I can't cook. I use a smoke alarm as a timer. -- Carol Siskind
• I asked this guy if he had the time. He said he'd love to give it to me, but he wasn't sure he could make the commitment.
  -- Carol Siskind...
• If I hadn't had them, I would have had some made.
• How many Alaskan women -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  "Hey Bob, this is Carol ... I think I have a light bulb out over here....
• When I woke up this morning, my girlfriend asked if I had slept well.
  I said, "No, I made a few mistakes." -- Steven Wrigh...
• There are places I'll remember All my life though some have changed.
  Some forever not for better Some have gone and some remain....
• Instead of the Miss America Pageant I could enter the Miss Neurosis Pageant.
  Among my hobbies are stewing in my own juices and blowing things out of proportion....
• I think I'm gonna lose my lunch!