Related:

• The way to a man's heart is through his pants -- wallet and underwear.
• My dad's pants kept creeping up on him. By 65 he was just a pair of pants and a head.
  -- Jeff Altma...
• Runners get into more pants.
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• I wore my extra loose pants for nothing. Nothing!
  -- Homer Simpson New Kid on the Block...
• Woman: I actually had some doubts about moving to Springfield, especially after that TIME cover story, "America's Worst City".
  Marge: [proudly] You could see our house in that photo!...
• Did you hear that those new edible candy pants are about to be distributed in a male version -- with nuts of course.
• I can tell I'm getting older. I'm starting to use "old people" cliches.
  The other day I actually told someone I slept like a baby....
• Abe: That's _my_ ambulance. I called for it four hours ago.
  Homer: Marge, how did you know -- Marge: That the pants would rip?...