Thank You For Calling Uncle Tom's Mortuary And Delicatessen.

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Thank you for calling Uncle Tom's Mortuary and Delicatessen.
You stab 'em and we slab 'em. We have specials on Mondays and
Thursdays. We are currently unable to come to the phone, but if
you leave your number and address at the tone, we'll be by to
pick up the corpse as soon as possible.
-- Answering machine madness - odd organizations