Related:

• Real computer scientists work from 5 pm to 9 am because that's the only time they can get the 8 megabytes of main memory they need to edit specs.
  (Real work starts around 2 am when enough MIPS are free for their dynamic systems....
• Real programmers do all their DTP work in DEBUG.
• Real programmers never deliver programs on Wednesdays.
  Real programmers never deliver programs on the first day of any month....
• Real Programmer n. [indirectly, from the book "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche"] A particular sub-variety of hacke
  one possessed of a flippant attitude toward complexity that is arrogant even when justified by experience....
• Real software engineers work from 9 to 5, because that is the way the job is described in the formal spec.
  Working late would feel like using an undocumented external procedure....
• Real Users hate Real Programmers.