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• Say what you like about my bloody murderous government," I says, "but don't insult me poor bleedin' country.
  -- Edward Abbey...
• Death tugs at my ear and says: "Live, I am coming." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.
• I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now.
  But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." -- Steven Wrigh...
• A small farmer on a kibbutz was talking to a big Texan.
  The Texan says, "How big is your farm?" Well, he says, it's 200 feet by 300 feet....
• I installed Windows into my car computer and it crashed.
• I just installed airbags in my car.
• Warning: I accelerate my car for conservatives.
• Beggar that I am, I am even poor in thanks. -- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet -- Act ii, Sc.
  2...