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• And then I woke up.
• Woke up this mornin' an' I had myself a beer, Yeah, Ah woke up this mornin' an' I had myself a beer The future's uncertain and the end is always near.
  -- Jim Morrison, "Roadhouse Blue...
• I woke up this morning and discovered that everything in my apartment had been stolen and replaced with an exact replica.
  I told my roommate, "Isn't this amazing? Everything in the apartment has been stolen and replaced with an exact replica....
• When I woke up this morning, my girlfriend asked if I had slept well.
  I said, "No, I made a few mistakes." -- Steven Wrigh...
• I woke up one morning and looked around the room. Something wasn't right.
  I realized that someone had broken in the night before and replaced everything in my apartment with an exact replica....
• I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library.
  When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. -- Rodney Dangerfield...
• It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up, because by that time I was too famous.
  -- Robert Benchley...
• It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give up because by that time I was too famous.
  -- Robert Benchly...