Related:

• I used to live in a house by the freeway. When I went anywhere, I had to be going 65 MPH by the end of my driveway.
  I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights....
• My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH.
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH.
  -- Stephen Wrigh...
• The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys.
  I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while....
• I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint.
  It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included....
• One day, when I came home from work, I accidently put my car key in the door of my apartment building.
  .. I turned it... and the whole building started up....
• I was drunk last night, crawled home across the lawn.
  By accident I put the car key in the door lock. The house started up....
• I was drunk last night, crawled home across the lawn.
  By accident I put the car key in the door lock. The house started up....
• I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be.
  I called someone. They went "Aaaaahhhh..." -- Steven Wrigh...