Related:

• 1. If you can get to the faulty part, you don't have the tool to get it off.
  2. If you can get the part off, the parts house will have it back-ordered....
• Campbell's First Law of Automotive Repair: If you can get to the faulty part, you won't have the tool to get it off.
• Marge: All right: it's time to vote for the grand prize.
  Jay: I vote for Barney Gumbel's sensitive yet unfortunately-titled film, "Pukahontas"....
• 1. When the need arises, any tool or object closest to you becomes a hammer.
  2. No matter how minor the task, you will inevitably end up covered with grease and motor oil....
• Bromberg's Second Law of Auto Repair: No matter how minor the task, you will inevitably end up covered with grease and motor oil.
• Marge: 90% of the time, if the gas isn't pumping, this is your problem.
  [turns a switch at back which resets the pump] Evely...
• Abe: Hey, the lamp's running away! Bart: That's my dog, man!
  Abe: So long, lamp. Now stop loafing and help your Grampa unpack....
• The more an item costs, the farther you have to send it for repair. -- Veil's Law of Value
• Our water pressure is so low, you have to run around in the shower to get wet. -- Peter Campbell