Related:

• While looking for a Real Job (read: technical writing), I've been paying the bills doing medical transcription work.
  I came across a book today called "The Empty Laugh Book" by the American Association for Medical Transcription, containing some of the funniest dictated and transcribed quotes from the world of medicine that I've ever encountered....
• Gobbler said, "Doctor, help me! I can't stop acting like a turkey!
  "I see," said the doctor. "How long have you had this problem?...
• There once was an career aggie who was well into his 12th year at A&M.
  His father, an arch-supporting alumni, was growing tired of his son not having graduated yet....
• The Letter D Pulls Out LETTER D PULLS SPONSORSHIP FROM SESAME STREET Noted Consonant Alienated By Controversial New Gay Muppet NEW YORK--A spokesperson for the letter D announced Monday that the consonant is withdrawing sponsorship from Sesame Street following a Children's Television Workshop announcement that a homosexual muppet will soon join the show's cast.
  "The letter D is proud to have brought you many wonderful Sesame Street episodes throughout the program's 28-year history," said Patricia Willis, public-relations director for D....
• Jeff invited his mom over for dinner. They were in the dining room eating quietly for awhile when Jeff's mom looked up and said, "You know, Jeff, I don't really like your friends.
  Jeff replied, "That's O.K., mom, just eat your vegetables....
• I Like 'em Dead I was just 13 when my mommy caught me French-kissing a cadaver in my bed.
  She said, "Son, how could you do this?" And I said "Mom, I like 'em dead....
• Rules that guys wished girls knew ** If you think you're fat, you probably are.
  Don't ask us. ** Learn to work the toilet seat. When the lid is up, put it down....
• A Letter from your mama... Dear Son: I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.
  We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved....
• Random thoughts... ** Home is where you can say anything you like 'cause nobody listens to you anyway.
  ** I live in my own little world, but it's ok, they know me here ** When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas!...