Related:

• There are three kinds of people in the world; those who can count and those who can't.
  And the related: There are two groups of people in the world...
• M.A.D.D is the acronym for Mathematicians Against Drunk Deriving .
  ... A Native American woman is sitting on a moose hide....
• A retired dentist who loves to fish. "Open wide," he mutters to the unseen fish as he waits for a tug on the line.
  Now bite down. This may sting just a little bit....
• People who say nothing is impossible don't have teenage
• The Democratic platform runs 35,000 words. Divided by the number of people who'll ever read it all, that's about 1,000 words each.
• People Who Should Be Phased Out (by George Carlin) ** Guy's who always harmonize the last few notes of "Happy Birthday.
  ** People over 40 who can't put on reading glasses without making self-conscious remarks about their advancing age....
• One Liners If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
  A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer....
• If Operating Systems Were Like Beers... DOS Beer: Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to read the directions carefully before opening the can.
  Originally only came in an 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz....