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• A doctor was at the beach when he saw a shark in the water and fainted dead away.
  Later when he woke his wife said to him, "You've got to quit imagining that there are lawyers everywhere!...
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....
• How do you keep an Englishman happy in his old age?
  Tell him a joke when he's young. Do you know why the British ships came back from the Falkland Islands full of sheep?...
• A woman from the south was attending a social gathering up north and tried striking up a conversation .
  .. "Where're you all from?" she asked to a group of ladies....
• All The Thanks I Need... A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned.
  The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny....
• My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
  Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• RACIAL/ETHNIC There were these two men drinking together in a bar.
  One was of Chinese extraction, the other Jewish....