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• The Chauffeur A Cardiologist came up with a new operating procedure that would cut down the time that heart surgery would take and would cause less trauma to the patient.
  He was praised by his peers when he presented it at a convention in Washington D....
• This "world-famous authority on the paranormal and supernatural" gave a lecture at Texas A&M and was impressed by the fact that the lecture hall was filled with Aggies eagerly listening and taking copious notes.
  At the conclusion of the lecture he announced a question and answer period....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• A fool wants to be king. A wise man wonders if he can handle the job.
• M.A.D.D is the acronym for Mathematicians Against Drunk Deriving .
  ... A Native American woman is sitting on a moose hide....
• Ever since I was a young boy, Megabogue I've sprayed phones in the mall.
  Brick Wall Painter" From Footscray to Beaumaris Pommy I must have sprayed them all....
• Hilarious Flight Information from the Airline Employees Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining.
  Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported...
• Two math professors were in a bar: PROF1: You know, every year, the students in my Calculus 100 class are getting dumber and dumber.
  It's getting so that I can't even teach a lecture without reviewing high school algebra....
• Murphy's Laws On Love and Sex The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.
  Nothing improves with age. No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again....