Related:

• The Wizard of Zone Once upon a time in Depression-era Kansas there was a little black boy named Zachary X (pronounced "ex" not "ten") who lived on a farm.
  He was an orphan, a cheap device to garner your sympathy....
• Running Bear finally woke up one morning to discover that he was a man.
  As such, he deduced, he would require a woman. So he trekked on over to the Medicine Man's teepee to requisition a woman....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• THE DARWIN AWARDS Date: December,1997 The Darwin Award is made each year to the person who has managed to kill themselves (and therefore prevent the survival of their genes - hence Darwin!
  ) in the most bizarre way imaginable. Previous winners have included the man killed when the vending machine he was trying to extract a can of Coke from fell on him, and last years aviator who strapped a JATO module (rocket) to his car and lit the blue touchpaper....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• Here are my categories, with examples (his): ENGLISH
  I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out....
• Intelligence "Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?
  aid the first ditch digger. "I don't know," responded the other....
• Butcher Dance A guy has spent five years traveling all around the world making a documentary on Native dances.
  At the end of this time, he has every single native dance of every indigenous culture in the world on film....
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....