Running Bear finally woke up one morning to discover that he was
a man. As such, he deduced, he would require a woman. So he
trekked on over to the Medicine Man's teepee to requisition a
"What you want, Running Bear?" queried the Medicine Man.
"Running Bear want woman!"
"Hmmm," said the Medicine Man, "do you know what to do with
a woman once you've got her?"
"Uh," said Running Bear, "no..."
"Then go into the woods for two months. Find a tree with a hole
in it, and practice on the tree. Once you have perfected your
technique with the tree, come back to me and I will give you
Running Bear agreed, and set off into the woods. Sure enough,
he found a tree with the appropriately sized hole, and began
his two months of practice. Two months later, he returned
to the Medicine Man with pride n his eyes.
"Okay," he said to the Medicine Man, "me know what to do. Give
The Medicine Man nodded and brought a pretty young squaw from the
back of the teepee. "Little Flower," he said to her, "you now
belong to Running Bear. Do as he asks."
Runnin Bear and Little Flower then retire to a vacant teepee where
Running Bear instructs her to bend over. She shrugs and complies.
Running Bear then gives her a swift kick in the ass.
"Hey!" cried Little Flower. "What did you do that for?"
"Me no stupid," explained Running Bear, "Me check for bees first."
The lecturer on physiology addressed the student nurses. "We will take
up the heart, kidneys, lung, and liver in that order." "Oh dear, another
organ recital," whispered on nurse to the other.
A paper ran an item staing that "The departing Mr. Smithers was a member
of the defective bureau of the police force."
The chief of police made a strong protest, whereupon the paper published
an apology as follows: "Our announcement should have read "The detective
branch of the police farce."
Did you know that 'gullible' is not in Webster's Dictionary?
There used to be a saying:
"The sun never sets on the British empire,
because God doesn't trust an Englishman in the dark."