Related:

• The mayor of New York offered a million dollars to anyone who could rid the city of pigeons.
  After two weeks, a man called city hall and agreed to do it, and the mayor met him on the brooklyn bridge at noon the following day....
• During a picnic for upscale lawyers in Sausalito, Biff and Skippy had had an ounce or two too much and decided to walk back into San Francisco.
  After five minutes, each began to argue about whose dick was the longest....
• A statistician is a man, who with his head in an oven and his feet in an ice bucket, will say that on the average he feels fine.
• 155 There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different sizes.
  His tool when at ease, Hung down to his knees, Oh, what must it be when it rises!...
• 82 There was a young man with a prick Which into his wife he would stick Every morning and night If it stood up all right -- Not a very remarkable trick.
• A group of scientists were doing an investigation into problem-solving techniques, and constructed an experiment involving a physicist, an engineer, and a mathematician.
  The experimental apparatus consisted of a water spigot and two identical pails, one of which was fastened to the ground ten feet from the spigot....
• 1) A topologist is a man who doesn't know the difference between a coffee cup and a doghunt.
  2) A statistician can have his head in an oven and his feet in ice, and he will say that on the average he feels fine....
• My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
  Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....
• A man was trapped on a deserted island that was sinking into the sea.
  As the water lapped around his feet, a motor boat suddenly approached the island....