Related:

• On a local radio station the Mental Health Association had this message
  "Does someone in your family suffer from schizoid?...
• Jerk! Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make.
  I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?...
• Voice Mail My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
  A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here....
• Here are some of my favorite jokes from the HBO special Jackie Mason On Broadway.
  Keep in mind that Jackie is a former rabbi. His father and two brothers are also rabbis....
• What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)... Chain Saw
  ( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can turn a chain saw off....
• From Sourcebook Magazine, Summer 1990, by Dan Gutma
  Would the invention of the telephone ever have gotten off the ground if Alexander Graham Bell's first call had gone ....
• Men, Translated "I'm going fishing." Really means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.
  "It's a guy thing." Really means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical....
• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....