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An Australian, A Frenchman And An Italian Are Talking About Married Life

An Australian, a Frenchman and an Italian are talking about married life:
ITALIAN :
When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in wine, then lick
it off, and my wife, she goes wild.
FRENCHMAN :
When I finish making love to my wife, I cover her head to toe in chocolate,
then lick it off, and my wife, she goes wild.
AUSSIE :
When I finish making love to my wife, I get out of bed and wipe my dick on
the curtains, and my wife, she goes wild.

A man is on vacation, and one evening he is walking down the beach and
he runs into a beautiful woman, who has no arms or legs. She is crying.
He asks her, "What's the matter?" She replies, "In all my life I've never
been hugged." He says no problem, gives her a hug, and continues on his
merry way. The next day, he sees the same woman, crying again, and he
asks her, "What's the matter?" She replies, "In all my life I've never
been kissed." He says no problem, gives here a kiss, and leaves. The
next day he is walking by the same stretch of beach and he sees her
lying there again, crying. He says to her, "I gave you a hug, I gave you
a kiss, what's the matter now?" She replies, "In all my life I've never
been fucked." He says, "Is that all?" and picks here up and throws her
in the ocean and says, "Now you're fucked!"

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