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  Says she, "You`re in luck, He's a stunning good fuck, For I`ve had him myself down in Leicester....
• How do you spell relief? W-I-N-D-O-W-S N-T
• A mathematician and his best friend, an engineer, attend a public lecture on geometry in thirteen-dimensional space.
  "How did you like it?" the mathematician wants to know after the talk....
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• Time For A New Clock When I was still a newlywed, I was invited out for a night with "the boys".
  Being naive about these things at the time, I promised my wife that I would be home by midnight!...
• Make it a double, Joe," the dejected man told the bartender.
  I just got the shock of my life. I caught my wife screwing my best friend....
• No, No, Nurse, I told you to prick his boil!!
• I THOUGHT I WAS WRONG O N C E! (but I was mistaken)