There Was Young Man From Crete Who Could Shoot Across The Street A Chemist Named Kelly Would Bottle The Jelly And Sell It As 'Extract Of Meat'.
Limericks - Dirty
There was young man from Crete
Who could shoot across the street
A chemist named Kelly
Would bottle the jelly
And sell it as 'Extract of Meat'.
There was a young man from Rangoon, Who's farts could be heard on the moon, When you least would expect them, They'd roar from his rectum, With a sound like a double bassoon!
There was a young fellow named Goody Who claimed that he wouldn't, but would he?
If he found himself nude With a gal in the mood, The question's not would he but could he?...
Needing Deodorant... A blonde woman walks into a chemist and asks the assistant for some bottom deodorant.
The assistant, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell bottom deodorant, and never have....
42 There was a young fellow named Goody Who claimed that he wouldn't, but would he?
If he found himself nude With a gal in the mood The question's not woody but could he?...
There was a young girl named Anheuser Who said that no man could surprise her.
But Pabst took a chance, Found Schlitz in her pants, And now she is sadder Budweiser....
There was a young man from Spartar, Who was an incredible farter.
At the strength of one bean, He could play "God Save the Queen", And Beethoven's "Moonlight Senata"....
Punny 1. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank-proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.
2. Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor....
There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to her lover's desire.
She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher?...